41 and distance.....

Today marks 41. I have sort of been detached all day.... a trip back .... and a tour of all the key spots.... a text sent.... and no response.... Distance.....

I just noticed that it has been an incredibly long time since I have stoppoed through on the Island.... School is winding down.... and the AP exams are behind us... I had to admit that other day.... that I am sort of looking forward to the end of the year. I can not ever remember looking for a year to be over.... well.... maybe during the darker days of the AD world.... but... never ever for the school world.

The high school baseball team played and lost in the district tournament. They have had a good season.... 18 wins to date... I have to admit feeling odd.... at the games I have attended.... but at the same time... I am 100% certain that I don't belong.

Welllllll 21st of May... the day of the year when I suffer the most from Janus .... I like to look backward.... for certain... it is that looking forward that is the most painful these days... without a single doubt.

Time it was... and what a time it was..... . It was a time of innocence.... a time of confidences..... Long ago it must be I have a photograph... Preserve your memories.... there all that's left you.....

I fell so distant from everyone and everything.... Distance